Distractions

I’m on my fourth cup of coffee

Yet I could sleep for one thousand years

I feel like everyone is staring at me

But they’re probably not

I’m starving but food just doesn’t sound good to me right now

I’m starting to wonder: “can people break

If so, surely I have

I’m trying so hard to listen but I can’t understand any words at all

My mind is away from here

Perhaps it’s where you’re at

Maybe it’s just hiding

What do I even do

I try to stay distracted

But every time I laugh or smile or speak I feel guilty

Guilty for having a moment of happiness

When you had so few and that’s why you decided to leave

I’m not allowed to be happy

Am I?  I shouldn’t be

How could I be happy about anything at a time like this

How can I do anything at a time like this

It’s times like these when I wonder where you’re at

What comes later, are you in the good place

Can you see me or hear me

Can you see all of us

I feel inadequate

Maybe I could have helped

But even the last thing I said to you

Reassuring and caring

Even that did not make a difference

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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